The Philosophical Soccer Hooligan

I'll never forget the first time my wife got angry with me. We weren't even engaged at the time. We were thousands of miles apart - she living in the USA and I in England. In truth, if you discount the internet and the telephone we hadn't even met yet, although we spoke more on the telephone than many couples do face to face as our thousand dollar a month phone bills testified. We were at once deeply committed lovers and strangers divided by an ocean. This is a strange mix that only those who have experienced long distance relationships can truly understand...

I remember it was a sunny day and I was calling her on my coffee break from work. I mentioned in passing that I was reading a book and when she inquired further I told her it was a book of philosophy. That was when she yelled at me.

"Philosophy? You led me to believe you were a dumb soccer hooligan and you're reading philosophy?"

It's astounding how loud a voice over the phone can sound when it's pressed to your ear.

Anyway, after taking a breath to recover from my surprise I discovered she  had made her assumption because I had told her about my weekly attendance to the games of Cheltenham Town Football Club (that's soccer to Americans). She'd learned something of the obnoxious and extremely rude chants we used and had heard me barely able to talk having screamed my way through watching the matches. I suppose, on reflection, her assumption was understandable, but here's the irony: Not long before she had told me how a co-worker of hers had come into her office and expressed surprise that she - a dedicated worker and political appointee - was also a quilter. Yet there she was, categorizing me into as tight a box as her co-worker had her. What it showed me was that even the very best of us are guilty of falling into that particular trap. Still, no harm no foul, right?

Not so fast. My wife graduated from the Vassar College English Literature program with very high grades. For those of you who don't know, Vassar is a top-notch college, about on a par with Cambridge and Oxford in England. She had assumed that with me being little more than a yob she had fallen in love with she was going to have to dumb herself down for me. This is a shame as I came to value her mind to ever greater extents as I learned more about just how smart she is. And boy is she smart!

So, there you have an explanation for the title of this blog. We all make assumptions about others and ourselves that can affect how we all interact. I want to use this blog to show some of the assumptions I've encountered in my journey as an English immigrant to the USA, as well as to explore the several loves of my life. I hope you find the voyage interesting.